And Then He Was Gone
by bloodredforthevampires
Summary: Edward leaves Bella. She unintentionally falls in love with her best friend, Jason. But what happens when Edward comes back? Who will she choose? BXE rated M for later chapters.
1. Gone

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Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. It belongs to the wonderful Stephenie Meyer. If I had my say in the matter though, Edward would be mine, mine, mine.

**So this is my first fanfic. It's dedicated completely to ashel-13. Because she's my favorite person in the world. If you haven't read her fic Making Love Out Of Nothing At All you are seriously missing out. For cereal.. It's amazing. Go read it. Well then, enjoy :)**

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One.

A soft melody was playing from the large stereo on the opposite side of the room as I laid next to my vampire. Yes, my vampire. I was lying on his extravagant bed with my head against his cold chest. He was tracing the blue veins on my wrist and humming along in perfect harmony with the music. I sighed. Sometimes he was just too perfect for me. I couldn't fathom how I'd ended up with such a man. Well, it was a loose interpretation of the word man, I admit. He was more like a god. Yes, definitely a god. He noticed my sigh and took my hand.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked me.

"Nothing, really," I said. "Just thinking about you," I admitted and sighed again in defeat. I couldn't let him down like that. I knew how hard it was for him not to be able to see into my mind like he could see into everyone else's.

"My Bella," he breathed. I could smell his sweet breath and my head swirled. "I worry about you, you know."

"Why?" I asked.

"Because," he replied softly. "It troubles me to know how much danger I present to you. And to have you thinking about me constantly pains me further. I love you so much. I fear for your safety every day."

"You don't have to worry about me. I need you, Edward, and only you. I don't care about my safety when I have such perfection in my presence." He knew how I felt. I, of course, didn't care how dangerous he said he was. I was willing to completely ignore it because I would actually prefer if he were to put me in the danger he spoke of. I would love to adopt his way of life. To become his equal. I was tired of feeling inferior to him. Not to mention, I was really getting frustrated at how little contact he allowed us to have. Suddenly, as if he read my mind, his cold lips were moving against mine. All too soon, though, he broke the kiss to allow me to breathe. I looked up at him and tried to read his face. I could see a trace of pain behind his light honey-colored eyes.

"Take a walk with me, love," he said, and gently pulled me from the bed. We walked behind his house. I squinted up at the sun and then looked at Edward. His pale skin was glimmering in the rays of the sun. He was gorgeous. "Listen to me for a while," he said as he sprawled out on the dewy grass and motioned for me to lay next to him. Instead, I sat with my legs crossed next to him and took his hand. I traced designs on his shimmering palm as he spoke. "It's been almost eight months now. Since the day I met you, I mean." He sighed and a troubled look crossed his face. But quickly, the corners of his lips turned up into that crooked smile that I loved so much. "I remember every day that we've spent together perfectly." He continued on and we talked about our favorite times together. But after each memory we shared, his eyes would darken slightly and he would remind me of how he came so close to taking my human life. This went on for a while and the sun began to retreat behind the hills. Edward's skin ceased to sparkle although his exquisite godliness never decreased. He stood slowly and pulled me up with him. He took my face in hs hands. "Bella, I want you to know that I will never stop loving you. And this love is the reason behind the decision I'm about to make. I've taken you through every wonderful day we've spent together. And now I must leave you."

I didn't understand what he was saying. I looked up into his eyes. They were a gentle butterscotch tone. He didn't need to hunt. What was he telling me? He read the confusion in my face.

"I can't be with you any longer. I can't stand the amount of danger I know I'm putting you through, so I'm ending it now. Never forget that I love you and I always will." And then he was gone. A few brown leaves fell from a tree to the right of where I stood. Immediately I ran towards them.

"Edward." It came out as a cracked whisper. I knew he was gone. I sank to the ground and clutched at my sides. I could feel myself falling apart. I laid my head against the cool grass and fell into the darkness. While I was in the complete black I felt a pair of strong arms whisk me away. I knew, though, that they were not Edward's.

I woke, finally. My head was throbbing. I looked up at the yellow curtains, heard the old computer wheezing, and pulled my old and tattered quilt up to my chin. I heard Charlie shut and lock the door as he left for work. Then reality smacked me in the face. I blinked furiously at the tears that were already pouring down my face. I cried, silently at first, then I let all my emotions loose when I couldn't hold it in any longer. I sobbed Edward's name over and over again. Edward, Edward, Edward. My vampire, the love of my life, the very core of my existence was gone. Forever. I pulled my knees up to my chest and began rocking slowly back and forth.

I don't know how long I stayed like that. Eventually, I pulled myself out of bed and trudged into the bathroom. I splashed cool water against my face and combed through the haystack that was my hair. Not wanting to move anymore, I walked back to my room and slipped a CD into my CD player. I automatically skipped to the eighth track. My lullaby began to sing through the headphones. That was when I noticed it. A white piece of paper, folded in half with my name on it was propped up on my nightstand. I hesitantly took it in my hands and read it.

"Bella, I know the hurt you're going through right now. But trust me, you are human and it will pass. Please don't do anything rash. I hope you didn't mind that I carried you home. I didn't want you to have to see the empty house. And I didn't want Charlie to have a heart attack, either. I've brought over all of your stuff from our place. We're moving in with another coven like ours, but don't go looking for us, please. You will get through this. I believe in you, sweetie.  
Alice."

I crumpled up the paper and threw it into the wastebasket. I then noticed the box of my belongings that had gathered at the Cullen's over time. A pair of sunglasses, a few books, an old t-shirt, and a not-too-shabby collection of make-up Alice had bought for me and forcibly applied when she thought I needed it. Which, unfortunately for me, was all the time. I tucked the box away in my closet. I couldn't look at it anymore. It was just a stupid reminder. A reminder of a past that I was supposedly going to forget. Yeah, right. Forget Edward? Never.

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**Soooo, that was it. I hope you guys liked it. And don't worry Edward is coming back, I promise. I just had to make him leave so their reunion would be that much sweeter. Review, please? I would loove some constructive criticism.**


	2. A Friend

**Disclaimer: Twilight is alll Stephenie Meyer's. Even Edward, although, I'm sure every human girl wishes he was hers. Dibs.**

**Here's chapter two! Once again, this story is dedicated to ashel-13. **

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Two.

It had been months since Edward left me. Things had picked up right where they left off. Everything was the same, except now there was a gaping hole where my heart used to be. I tried my best to ignore it, but it seemed that just about everything in the world reminded me of him. The only thing holding me together was my friend Jason. Jason was really friendly. He had a warm smile and bright green eyes. His hair was cut short and he wore faded jeans and an old band t-shirt every day. He always knew how to make me laugh, so I often went to him for comfort.

It was on his bed that I now sat. I couldn't really understand the feelings that I felt for him. I knew I would never love anyone more than Edward but I yearned for someone's arms around me, someone's lips on mine, someone's breath on my cheek. Jason was my best friend, but lately he was becoming more. I watched him as he sat lazily in a chair on the other side of the room, pencil and sketchbook in hand. He was a great artist, and I was his favorite subject. He wanted a casual portrait of me so I was instructed to sit on his bed with my legs crossed at the ankles. Every now and then he would tell me a joke to make me laugh.

Once, he told me one about his friend Colin and how he had tried to decapitate a garden snake in his back yard. Colin had a rusty shovel in hand and he was poking and prodding around in bushes. Finally, the snake emerged and Colin swung madly at it, flailing his arms and trying to strike hard, but at the same time hit accurately. Jason had videotaped the whole thing because it was just that hilarious. Colin was highly embarrassed because he never did hit the snake. So, the next night he climbed up into what he thought was Jason's bedroom window to retrieve the video. But it was the guest room of the house and Jason's grandmother was currenly occupying it. Colin said that he saw her in nothing but a hot fuschia nightie and was traumatized for life. He fell off the side of the house and ran home, luckily unharmed. When Jason was finished telling it I threw my head back in laughter. Just then Jason yelled out and I snapped my head back up.

"No, no!" he said. "Put your head back like that and laugh, it was really sexy." So I did and he frantically erased and sketched trying to get it perfect. After what seemed like hours he said he was done. I rubbed the back of my neck and groaned in pain. It was really sore. Suddenly, I felt a pair of warm hands working at the tense muscles around my neck and shoulders.

"Ahh, thanks Jason, you're a life saver," I said. He continued to knead and I was feeling more and more relaxed. So, I stretched out on my stomach and sighed in content. Jason stopped massaging. I was about to protest, but then I felt him straddling my back and his hands were back on my shoulders. But this time they travelled lower and lower until they rested just centimeters away from the top of my jeans. Jason slid himself down my legs and flipped me over so I was lying on my back staring up at him. He began to massage my feet and then his hands worked upwards. I hadn't felt a man's touch on my legs in so long. But, instead of clutching at my sides because I missed Edward, I felt myself slightly aroused. I knew it was wrong. But if this was wrong, then I didn't want to be right. He felt so good. Then he stopped and gently straddled my hips. I gazed up into his green eyes. My heart was thumping erratically.

"Bella," he breathed. "Is this okay?" I wasn't sure what he meant, but it was definitely okay. I hadn't felt this okay in months.

"Yeah," I said. "It's...great." He placed his warm hands gently on my waist. His head was inclined and he was slowly leaning forward. I could feel his hot breath on my face. I had to make a decision. Edward left me. He left me! He wanted this to happen didn't he? He wanted me to forget about him. He wanted me to move on, right? But, he said that he would always love me. And I knew I would always love him. But would it be so terrible if I fell for my best friend?

There was no more time. Jason was inches away from my face. I closed the distance quickly, before I could change my mind. His warm lips were a surprise to me. I'd only ever had Edward's cold lips on mine. But this was wonderful. His tongue slid across my lips and I granted him access. He deepened the kiss and I wrapped my arms around his neck. His hands travelled lower and lower until they were resting on my butt. He squeezed gently. I let out a small moan into his mouth. He squeezed again, a little harder this time. God, this was making me crazy. Edward had never allowed this. It was fantastic though. Just then, he stopped so we could breathe.

"God, Bella. I've imagined this before, but I never thought you'd be okay with it. Are you absolutely sure? The last thing I want to do is make this uncomfortable."

Oh, no. What was he asking me? Oh, no! Edward! I had just betrayed Edward! This was not okay. I pushed Jason off. He looked at me sadly.

"I'm so sorry Jason, I can't do this. I wasn't thinking clearly. Oh, God I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to lead you on!" He put his finger to my lips.

"It's okay," he whispered gently. "I understand. I know how you feel. I'm sorry for putting you under pressure."

"I'm okay, Jason. I'm just worried about you. Doesn't this make you unhappy? Aren't you upset?" He smoothed my hair and whispered again.

"Shhh, Bella. Don't worry about me. I can move on. I know how strong your bond with Edward was though. I'm so sorry to have done that to you. I'll never do it again." Then the tears broke through. I held my knees up to my chest and cried silently. Jason soothingly rubbed my back and whispered "It's okay, it's okay" into my ear.

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**Like it? Hate it? Review, please. I want to know that I'm not just wasting my time with this. Well actually right now I'm stuck at home with a serious case of sinus congestion so it's not like I have anything better to do with my time. But, you know what I mean.**


	3. Alaska

**Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer, I do not own Twilight or any characters associated and/or affiliated with it. Except the Edward in my mind. He's mine, oh so mine.**

**For ashel-13, because she continues to amaze me with her writing and taste in music.  
I decided to put Edward's point of view in here. He's just too sexy to be left out in the cold, yeah?**

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As Jason sat there rubbing my back, I decided to use the time to think. Here was this boy who was giving up his own happiness to help me. He had given me everything he could give me and asked for nothing in return.

He was truly amazing. And all this time I'd just been leading him on. But did I really not want him? No, I wanted him. Not only did I want him...I loved him. I loved Jason. He had been there when no one else could, warmed me when I was left in the cold, cheered me when all traces of joy were wiped clean from my body.

But I loved Edward. Did I though? Edward had made me feel complete. He had brought a new outlook into my life and introduced me to a world of fairy tales that I had come to love. And I never would've stumbled upon it without Edward. He had expressed his love to me in so many different ways; the most recent was leaving me. Leaving me..for me. Yes, I did love him.

Did.

I was confused. Fresh tears began streaming down my face. Jason looked at me with what could only be concern. I sniffled. A smile appeared across his face and instantly, the tears stopped. His smile spread warmth throughout my entire body. I felt completely relaxed. It was then that I made my decision.

Before this moment, I had always believed that Edward was coming back for me. That he would give in to the temptation and come sweep me up in his arms. That we would be reunited and together forever.

But he hadn't come back. What did that mean? It had been months. Maybe he had fallen in love with another, someone a million times more beautiful than I would ever be. Maybe he couldn't bring himself to come back and put my life in danger again. There were endless possibilities.

But if he loved me enough to leave me, then surely he would love me enough to understand why I gave up on him. If he ever came back, that is.

I looked up into Jason's empathetic, green eyes. He gently wiped the tears off my face with his thumb. I let go of my knees and crawled into his lap. He leaned back against the wall and sighed contentedly.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly while he pulled my hair back away from my face.

"I'm great. Thank you." I turned so I was facing him and planted a chaste kiss on his unsuspecting lips. "I love you, Jason." He seemed to understand that I really meant it this time, but he didn't want to make it any harder so he remained silent. I smiled. This was a good decision. I knew Jason wouldn't make it awkward. That's just how he was.

**EPOV**

Snow crunched somewhere behind me. I ignored the sound. I didn't want to be bothered by anyone. Just as I was about to get up and move, Alice appeared by my side. Too late. She wasn't her normal bubbly self. Her eyes were like charcoal, and smoldering with anger. I looked at her.

"What's up?" I asked monotonously.

"You know perfectly well what is up, Edward," she spat. "I have been searching this godforsaken place for the past three days. We are the only ones here just like you wanted. And I mean that. There's not even any animals here anymore. Boy, you sure know how to pick them. This place is deserted. I am so _thirsty_! I'm trying to be supportive, Edward, really I am. But there's only so long I can go without some type of food. Are you listening to me?"

_No._

"Absolutely, Alice," I lied. "You can leave if you want. Go back to Denali, just tell the others that I won't be there for a little while longer."

We were in Alaska. A completely deserted part of Alaska. After I left Bella, I had no desire to be with anyone else but her. So I settled for just that. No humans, no vampires...no animals, apparently. The rest of the family was in Denali. They were all supportive of me, but Alice was the only one who agreed to come with me here. She had had visions of me while we were staying in Denali that made her quite fretful and she knew that I needed to get away before one of them actualy happened.

But lately she was being a poor sport. We had apparently already killed the entire three polar bears, and five penguins that lived here. It had been months and we were eating only when absolutely necessary. But nonetheless there were no more animals we could dine on. I didn't mind. Who needs food when your life has ceased to exist?

Alice's face softened. "I'm sorry. I know you're having a hard time." She put her tiny hand on my shoulder. "I really miss everyone, though. Especially Jasper." She grimaced. "But I promised I would be here for you, so I'm not leaving. Help me find food, please. We haven't eaten in 3 weeks." She stood and I rose with her.

"Let's go," I said. And we took off running to the west. We ran until the sun began to sink behind the mountains. Trees began to appear every few miles. They were getting thicker. We both slowed a little and tuned in our senses.

"This way," Alice hissed. She ran off to my left and I followed. She led us farther and farther until we were deep in a dense forest. I could smell blood. It was everywhere. I held my palm up to Alice and she stopped. I began to sniff to determine where the scent was coming from. Alice gazed into the forest, her eyes glazed over. After a few moments, she snapped back to life.

"That's _human_ blood," she said in a disgusted tone. "Something weird is going on out here. It can't be vampires, they wouldn't spill so much blood. I can't see anything though. We'll just have to check it out ourselves."

She took off and I followed suit. In less than a minute we were hit with waves of a reeking stench. We were standing in a large clearing. At the very north end stood a gigantic rock. The place was drenched in blood. From the smell of it, very old blood. Stale. Human skeletons were scattered everywhere throughout the clearing.

Alice gasped. "Oh, Edward! What _is_ this? It's disgusting!"

Just then I heard a twig snap, roughly two miles to the east of where we were standing. I inhaled deeply. What I smelled was even worse than the blood. It took me a few seconds to recognize the smell. Then a few more to put two and two together.

Werewolves.

I snarled loudly, to make my presence known. Which may or may not have been a completely idiotic move. Who knew how many werewolves were in this pack? And it was only me and Alice.

I tuned into her thoughts. She was trying to see, but everything was clouded over. I grabbed her forearm and shook her out of her vision.

I tried to form a coherent sentence. But at the same time the danger we were in was becoming more and more apparent. We had to do something.

"Werewolves." I choked out.

"Run," gasped Alice.

**BPOV**

"Pizza?" asked Jason.

"Nah, I'm not really in the mood for that right now.. Hmm. Chinese?" I suggested.

"I don't know any good places around here. We could try to make something ourselves if you're up to the challenge.."

I scoffed. "If I'm up for the challenge? Oh, you're on, Bobby Flay. Let's see who can cook up the best meal in that pathetic excuse for a kitchen you've got."

"So that's how this is gonna fly? Fine then, Rachel Ray! Let's get it on!"

We raced each other to the kitchen, stumbling and laughing.

"Let's set some ground rules," Jason said as he held the counter for support. "We each HAVE to eat what the other conjures up. So, nothing gross, obviously."

"Oh, now wait just a minute! I think we both know that I have the upperhand in the kitchen. I don't want to eat your death-creations! I might as well drink some poison and keel over now!!"

Jason looked appalled. "Well, I never! You really don't trust me in the kitchen?"

"Absolutely not!" I giggled.

"Hmph. You'll see." He flung a spatula at me and held his own up. "ON YOUR MARK...wait!! This calls for some music." He dashed to his room and dragged a speaker out into the hall. I stared at him incredulously. He lifted an eyebrow. It was really kind of sexy.

"I made this CD just for an occasion like this."

"You were anticipating a cook-off in the near future?"

"I never know what to expect with you, Bella."

He ran back into the kitchen, sliding on his socks for the last few feet. He slammed full speed into me and we both fell to the floor laughing.

"Jason," I said between giggles. "I can't cook if I've got a concussion. Let me up!" I swatted playfully at his arm. He let out a low growl and picked himself up. He retrieved his spatula, held it up like he was in a fencing battle, and motioned for me to do the same.

"On your mark! Get set!" He pressed the play button on the stereo remote. "GO!!" He bellowed over the music that had just started.

I couldn't bring myself to start once I heard the music playing. I was instantly doubled up laughing.

"What, may I ask, is so hilarious?" Jason asked.

"Are you seriously asking me that? Says the man who has the Ninja Rap on CD!"

He smirked and proceeded to yell "Go ninja, go ninja, go!" Then he dropped down on the floor and performed a really weak breakdancing routine.

I couldn't hold it in any longer. I was on the floor crying with laughter. I'm sure I was there for quite a while. A few more really embarrassing songs played, but none were as hilarious as the Ninja Rap. When I finally caught my breath, I sat up. Jason was right in front of me twirling his spatula in his hands, his emerald eyes sparkling.

"If I would've known it would be this hard for you to start cooking I wouldn't have proposed this cook-off."

"Oh, Jason, I'm sorry. Seriously, how low can you get? The Ninja Rap?" I giggled at the thought of it. I was on the verge of beginning another bout of laughter.

"Ohh, no you don't!" he said and he scooped me up off the floor. "We'll just have to save this contest for another night. I already won."

Sure enough he had two chicken breasts in the oven and was steaming a delicious medley of vegetables. There were some really good looking crescent rolls waiting to be popped into the oven, too. There was no was I could catch up now. Jason placed me on the counter.

"You beat me."

"You sound shocked. That'll show you not to trust me in the kitchen," he smirked and returned to his food. I watched him cook. I was surprisingly really turned on by it. I'd never known a man who was good in the kitchen. I didn't really have much to compare to, but it was great just the same. His toned muscles glistened with a light sheen of sweat. Kitchens are always really hot. I guessed he senses my ogling and turned to look at me.

"Yes?" he said slowly.

I blushed. "Nothing.. Just watching you."

He turned back around. He made a big show of fanning himself and wiping the sweat of his forehead. Finally, he took his dampened shirt off and threw it right in my face.

"Ahh, gross Jason!" I pulled the sweaty cotton off and threw it to the ground. Nothing could prepare me for what I saw next.

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**So sorry to leave you hanging like that. (Not really.) **

**But I have to have more to write later :) Reviews would be lovely.**


	4. Declarations

**Disclaimer: Twilight is Stephenie Meyer's and I am not her.**

**Enjoy :)**

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**EPOV**

I began to pace back and forth. Alice was sitting on the cold ground, eyes closed. I didn't want to see into her mind. I didn't need to frustrate myself as she was doing. We both knew that it was pointless to try to see anything. Vampires can't see werewolves.

We had been running for the past hour. We stopped in a small clearing surrouded by dense trees as soon as we were far enough away that we couldn't smell the...dogs.

How dare they kill all those people! How dare they complicate my already complicated life! What right did they have to ruin everything? Now Alice and I had no choice but to go back and tell someone. Innocent lives were at stake now. And once we told someone, we'd be in on solving the problem, no doubt.

Oh, hell. This was going horribly.

"Edward!" Alice exclaimed.

"Hmm?" I didn't know if I should be as excited as her. She had a tendency to take everything a step too far.

"Lydia is going to try to make a move on Jasper and he's going to tell her exactly how much he loves me and that just because I'm gone doesn't mean he's going to be unfaithful!!"

"Is that what you've been doing this whole time? Watching Jasper? While all of these humans are losing their lives to merciless beasts? I don't believe you."

"Oh, but Edward I was only checking up. You know I can't see the dogs anyways! What good would it do me to stare into fog? At least I know that Jasper's okay and he still loves me.. now I can concentrate on helping you think of a plan!" I couldn't believe she was actually worried that Jasper would cheat on her.

"Hallelujah," I said sarcastically. "Well, now that _you're_ helping we can get out of this mess!" Alice just had a smug grin on her face like she actually believed that.

"Well...?" I said. "Any ideas?"

"I think we should go back to Denali." Of course she would think that. She had someone she loved to go home to. And that someone was waiting there just for her. Some people had all the luck. Some people have all the love.

Oh, Bella. Why did I ever leave her? She was my whole existence. I couldn't live forever like this. Would she really be safer without me? It was true, I'd made it this far without her sweet blood. Maybe I could live like that. But how would I ever show her how much I loved her. How could I please her in the way that I knew she wanted to be pleased?

Simple. Turn her. She wanted it. If I could turn her myself maybe I could live with it. Maybe. It didn't seem so bad.

But I would be turning her into a foul monster, a soulless creature. A beast not so different than these damned werewolves that were so hungrily devouring people. I could never live with myself for spoiling such a pure soul. But I couldn't live without my Bella.

"Let's go," I said finally. "We can't do this alone."

"Oh, Edward!" Alice hugged me fiercely. "I knew you'd come around!" Of course she did.

**BPOV**

_He turned back around. He made a big show of fanning himself and wiping the sweat of his forehead. Finally, he took his dampened shirt off and threw it right in my face._

_"Ahh, gross Jason!" I pulled the sweaty cotton off and threw it to the ground. Nothing could prepare me for what I saw next._

There he stood, looking more gorgeous than anyone (other than a vampire) ought to have the right to look. The elastic strip of his boxers was just poking out over the edge of his jeans; something I found very attractive. His chest was more muscular than I thought and his hair was slightly matted due to the heat of the kitchen.

And boy, was it hot in here or what? I felt myself extremely turned on. I squirmed on the counter top. I took a deep breath. It didn't help the situation much. I only smelled the delicious aromas wafting off his food. He was such a good cook. And he was an artist. He gave great massages. And he had such a warm smile. He always knew how to cheer me up. And he was unbelievably sexy.

Not helping, I said to myself. But it was all true.

"Your supper is served, madam," announced Jason awhile later. We ate in companionable silence. The meal was really good. I had to hand it to him, the man knows his food. After we ate and washed the dishes I went to call Charlie and tell him I was on my way home so he wouldn't have a stroke.  
Jason stood stubbornly in front of the phone and cleared his throat.

"Can I help you?" I asked.

"I won," he simply stated.

"Yes. You want a cookie? A round of applause? A medal?"

He leaned back on his heels. "Welll," he sighed. "I think I should get some type of reward."

"Well what do you want?" I asked hesitantly. I really wasn't sure what he was getting at.

"Your..." He fumbled around for the right words. "Your consent?"

"My consent about what?"

"Well...are...are we...um...well...er..." He was so cute. "Are we...together?" Finally.

"Well, that depends on what you mean by together. Yes, we are together, here in the kitchen. Or do you mean as a...couple?"

"Yes. As a couple." He blushed deeply. And I thought I was the only one.

"If you're in, I'm in," I said to him. Deep down, my heart throbbed. It hadn't really beat in so long. The poor thing was sore. Hopefully, everything would be okay. No, everything would be okay. I had almost no doubts. I loved this man. Absolutely loved him.

Jason smiled that warm smile. He gently took my arms and kissed me passionately.

"I love you, Bella Swan," he said when we had to breathe.

"I love you too." He smoothed my hair and directed me towards the phone. He gave me a quick kiss on the forehead.

"Let's hold off on telling the chief until tomorrow," he said. I nodded my head fervently. The longer I could put off telling Charlie I had another boyfriend, the better. Charlie said that he would be out with the boy's for a while. There was a big game on tonight. He gave me permission to stay out an hour past curfew. I hung up the phone smiling.

"We have one hour."

He grinned. "Board games!!" And he sped off into the house returning with Monopoly and Chutes and Ladders. "You pick."

"Hmm, you have such a variety of games. I don't know how I'll ever be able to choose!" But I pointed my finger and Chutes and Ladders anyways. Monopoly was a very frustrating game for me. I never landed on the good properties and got sent to jail at least once during every game.

"Winner gets a kiss?" he suggested.

"Ha ha," I said sarcastically. "It's a win/win scenario, huh?"

"Well I wouldn't want to upset you so early on in our relationship. I already know you're gonna lose. I had to make it a rewarding experience." He smirked and began to set up the game.

Jason moved his piece forward three spaces. I was about 20 spaces away from winning.

"Two more and I win," he chuckled. "You're tough competition."

I slapped his arm playfully. "Stop it right now, mister. Just because I suck at... well, life in general doesn't mean you can make fun of me." He leaned across the board.

"You do not suck at life," he whispered into my ear.

"Means a lot coming from you," I scoffed.

"It should." He put his finger under my chin and lifted my face up to look at him. "I love you, Bella. Love is the best thing life can give you." His lips brushed lightly against my jaw. "I love you." He kissed the corner of my eye. "I love you." He kissed the tip of my nose. "I love you." Our lips met. I accepted him eagerly. He was so warm. I wrapped my arms around his neck and clutched him tightly. I didn't ever want to let go.

"I love you," I said and nestled myself into his lap. He gently stroked my back until our hour was up and then drove me home, where he proceeded to carry me up the stairs and lay me in bed since Charlie wasn't home yet. He kissed me one last time and left me for the night.

That night I had a dream that I was pushing a little boy on a swing. His hair was coppery-brown and thrown in every direction. He had a crooked grin on his face. The boy jumped off the swing and came to run into my arms. His eyes looked strange to me.

They were golden.

I woke with a start. I wrapped my arms around myself and began to rock back and forth, slowly. _Edward._


	5. Breakdown

BPOV

I got up quickly. I knew I wouldn't be able to get back to sleep. Who was that little boy in my dream? Was it someone I knew? He looked an awful lot like Edward. And if I remember it right, when he came to run into my arms he sort of fell into them. He was definitely a clumsy little fellow.

And he was beautiful. Maybe he was my...son. I'd never really given much thought to children. But I knew that it was something that I wanted eventually. I had to stop thinking for now though. That little boy was too much like Edward and I didn't even want to imagine what that meant.

It was Sunday morning and Charlie was out fishing with the boys. I went to the bathroom and took a steamy shower. Then I lazily dressed in blue jeans and a white blouse. I blowdryed my hair and and walked downstairs to the kitchen to eat.

I popped a bagel in the toaster and checked for messages on the phone while I was waiting. Four messages. One from Angela and three from Jason. I called Angela first.

"Hello? Bella?" she answered.

"Hi, Angela."

"Oh, thank goodness you called! I haven't been able to get in touch with anybody. I forgot to write down our Biology homework from last class. Do you know what it was?" Poor Angela. She'd probably been freaking out the whole weekend.

"The review questions at the end of chapter 5 were all we had to do," I replied.

"Okay, thanks a million, Bella. I don't know what I'd do without you!" She sighed in relief.

"No problem. Well, my breakfast is waiting so I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay, see you later, bye!" And she hung up. I decided I'd call Jason after I ate.

I spread a heaping amount of cream cheese on my bagel. Cream cheese was definitely my weakness. I swear, if I had the chance I would live off of the stuff and never tire of it.  
About three bites in, the phone started ringing. I rolled my eyes. It was probably Jason. I slowly walked over to the phone. Yep, it was Jason.

"Hello?" I said.

"Bella! I've been trying to call you all morning! Where have you been?" he almost yelled into the phone.

"Well good morning to you too. I've been sleeping. Sorry to inconvenience you."

"Oh no, I didn't wake you up did I?"

"No, Jason." He let his breath out right into the receiver. It made a loud crackly sound and I had to hold the phone away from my ear a few inches.

"I'm sorry, I won't call you like that any more. I should've known you'd want to sleep in. Well, good morning, my darling. How did you sleep?" I deliberated telling him about my dream for a few seconds and ultimately decided he didn't need to know. Not right now anyways.

"Great. You?"

"I've slept better. I missed you."

"Me too," I replied. "What do you want to do today?"

"Well my dad is out fishing with Charlie and Harry and my mom's in D.C. for a press conference. Wanna hang out at my house?"

"Sure. Um..." I thought for a second about where my keys were. On top of the washing machine. I had somehow, by an act of the gods, remembered to empty my pockets before washing my jeans. But before I could tell him I was on my way he said,

"I'll be there to pick you up in about twenty minutes."

"Oh, you don't have to do that. I'm perfectly capable of driving myself."

"But your truck is so slow," he whined. "My car is much faster." I didn't particularly like it when he made fun of my truck. I loved that car.

"My truck isn't that slow," I said defensively. "I could drive it faster if I wanted to."

"But have you ever tried?" he asked.

"Well, no. But I'm sure if I was driving, my baby would listen and go faster. He knows me. And I know him. We work well together."

"What, did you name the thing too?" Yes.

"No! I just... I'm very attatched to him." He chuckled into the phone.

"I'll be there soon, Bella." And he hung up. I put mine back on the charger and went to finish my breakfast.

Then I walked back upstairs to my room and, quite uncharacteristically, decided to pick it up a little. I even made the bed. I looked back and admired my work when I was finished. Too clean. I tore the covers off my bed and threw them back on in a disorderly heap. Much better.

I walked into the bathroom and brushed my teeth thoroughly, rinsing with mouthwash and carefully flossing. I didn't really floss often, but I had nothing better to do.

I didn't have enough time to start up my ancient computer to check the endless e-mails Renee had undoubtedly sent me. There was already a load of clothes in the washer and dryer. The dishes were clean. I started to wander around the house aimlessly. Jason had better hurry up.

Right on cue, I heard the purr of his car pulling into the driveway. I smoothed my hair and waited by the door for him to knock. He knocked. I reached to open the door, but then decided that it was too soon. I waited for about fifteen seconds. Plenty of time for me to walk from the kitchen to the door. I didn't want him to think I was just sitting at home waiting for him like I didn't have anything better to do. Although it was quite true.

Finally I opened it. He looked a hot mess. He was wiping rain off his face and his short hairhis clothes were smattered with raindrops. Oops. I hadn't noticed it was raining. And I had just made him wait outside my door for no reason, just because I was being self-concious. Oh well.

"Hi, Jason," I said. A grin appeared on his face as he gathered me up into a bear hug.

"Hey," he replied simply. "Let's go." We ran out to his car to get out of the rain. The engine roared to life and he backed out of the driveway. "What are you in the mood to listen to?"

"Hmm..." I definitely didn't want to listen to anything that would remind me of Edward. "How about some rock? Seventies or eighties, maybe?" I said.

He smiled. "Good choice." And he slid a CD into the stereo.

Nothing But A Good Time by Poison started playing. I smiled. Edward would never listen to this. He didn't like the eighties much. They were just 'bearable' to him. Fine. I liked the eighties. I was almost surprised at myself. I didn't know why I didn't miss Edward as much as I should. He was still my life. But I was...what was I? Why did I feel like this? I knew part of it was the fact that I had Jason. And he filled in the hole in my heart.

But it wasn't just that. I was...angry with Edward. Angry at him for leaving me. That was it. I took a deep breath and focused my attention back to Jason. His eyes were concentrated on the road and his head was bobbing up and down with the music.

Come Sail Away by Styx started playing.

"Aww, I didn't think you would like this song, you big marshmellow." I laughed at Jason.

"I like the second half better. This first part is kinda mushy for my taste."

"Suuuure," I said. "I know better than that."

"Whatever you say, Bella. Whatever you say," he replied. Just then the synthesizer instrumental came on. Jason stopped the car on the shoulder of the road and prepped himself for his second half, I was sure. When it came on he air-guitared and sang the rest of the song, quite terribly, if I was being honest. But the effort was still cute.

I gave him a round of applause at the end. "Wonderful performance, Dennis DeYoung," I praised him.

"Thanks," he said sheepishly.

The rest of the drive to La Push was quite uneventful. We talked a little, but mostly listened to the CD playing. When we got to the house the song Babe, also by Styx, started playing.

"We gotta listen to this one," Jason said. He unbuckled himself and I copied him. He took my hand, gently and sang along.

"Babe I'm leavin' I must be on my way The time is drawing near My train is going I see it in your eyes The love, the need, your tears But I'll be lonely without you And I'll need your love to see me through So please believe me My heart is in your hands And I'll be missing you."

When he was trying, he was really a good singer. He was mostly in tune and his voice was so warm. I listened intently for a while. Then he leaned into my ear and gently bit the lobe. The action sent shivers down my spine.

"Babe, I love you," he breathed into my ear. He played with a lock of my hair for a while and then pulled me onto his lap during the guitar riff. I was straddling his legs, resting just above his knees. We stared into each other's eyes for a few moments. His were such a pretty green. I wished mine were that color. He had stopped singing, joining in only to say "Babe, I love you" at the appropriate times.

I hadn't noticed but we had been leaning closer and closer together. His face was inches away from mine. He ran his fingers gently through my hair and down my back, massaging on his way down. He kneaded expertly at the tight knots in my back. I sighed and placed my hands on his chest.

When the song was over he kissed me gently. His tongue ran across my bottom lip. I granted him access without hesistation. The song We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off by Jermaine Stewart came on next. We both smiled but ignored the irony for the most part.

He deepened the kiss slowly, which I enjoyed. We were just beginning to learn the feel of each other, just beginning to experience each other's tastes. His breath was minty sweet and I could never get enough of it. His hands rested lightly on my waist. I wrapped my own around his neck and pulled him closer. Everytime we were together I felt the need to hold him close and never let go. I tightened my embrace and felt him smile against my mouth. Self-conciously, I broke the kiss and looked at him.

"What?" I asked breathlessly.

"You, my darling, are too adorable for your own good," he chuckled. "The way you cling to me like there's no tomorrow...mmm...it's a huge turn on." He grinned.

"Well," I said. "I'm glad you liked it." I smiled and slid myself further up his legs to be closer to his muscular chest. He groaned and his head fell back against the headrest. I looked at him and shifted a little, unsure if I should move or not.

"Don't move," he said quietly.

"Wh..." I started to ask. But I stopped myself and meekly said "Oh." Suddenly, I could feel his very prominent arousal right in between my own legs. I felt a rush of heat run from my cheeks all the way down to my own center of arousal. The thought of his member in such close proximity made me squirm and whimper ever so quietly.

Jason put his hands firmly on my hips. They then began to travel up my sides underneath my shirt and I gasped in surprise. I guess he misread my reaction because he slid his hands back out. Instead, he reached up towards my face, ever so lightly grazing my left breast. My back arched and I moaned involuntarily. Jason groaned again. We ad to get out of the car. Soon.

Aparently, Jason was thinking the same thing. He took the keys out of the ignition and held them in between his teeth. He opened the car door and I stepped out. The cement driveway felt weird under my feet and my balance was slightly off. Luckily, Jason was out of the car not two seconds later and he scooped me up bridal style and carried me into the house.

Without saying a word he laid me down on his bed and dropped the keys on the floor. He crawled on top of me and pressed himself into me as he resumed his relentless assault on my lips. This kiss was different than the ones we had had before. This one hurt. It felt angry and forced. I pushed him off and looked at him.

He was crying.

"Jason! Jason, honey, what's wrong?" I put my hands on his face. It was burning up. I hoped my hands were cool against his skin. "Sweetie, you can tell me. I'm here for you. Please tell me what's going on." I massaged his shoulders soothingly. "Please, tell me."

His face was hard, his mouth was set in a straight line. He was angrily blinking at the traitor tears from his eyes.

"I can't do this to you, Bella. It doesn't matter how much I want it. I want you to be happy and I know that this is just gonna bite us both in the ass. We can't do this."

"But...I'm fine! I'm fine!" I tried to climb back into his lap but he pushed me away.

Rejection burned fiercely in my chest. I could feel the tears welling up. He looked away from my face and stared out the window.

"No, Bella. This is all a mistake. And I know that somewhere deep in your heart, you know it too. You haven't had enough time to recover from the loss of Edward. This is just a phase you're going through. I just know that if we were to continue like this, you'd realize too that you don't want this. I've had you in my life for too long not to notice that you aren't really happy."

He was right. I had always felt a little weird with Jason. But I had pushed the negativity away because I needed him. I was using him. I was just using him to get over Edward and that was wrong. My own traitor tears began to brim over my eyelids and I clutched at my sides.

"I'll take you home," Jason said.

I didn't argue. 


	6. The Plan

**Disclaimer: I forgot this stupid thing last time. So sue me. Not literally though. Stephenie Meyer owns! **

**Sorry for the short chapter. The rest isn't ready yet, but I wanted to give you all something. Enjoy :)**

**EPOV**

"Hi, Edward," someone said coyly in my ear. I shuddered in distaste.

"Hello, Tanya."

"I've missed you sooooo much!" Her arms snaked around my waist. Venom pooled in the back of my mouth. I tried to casually shrug out of her unwelcome embrace but she only grasped tighter.

"And I you," I lied. "How have you been?"

"Oh, I've been doing fine. I've been looking for a mate for a while now. I just can't seem to find the right guy," she pouted. "Maybe we can solve that soon." She smiled.

"Uh huh." _Hell no._ "Well I need to see Carlisle. Nice catching up with you." I slipped out of her arms and flung myself towards Carlisle's room in the Denali house. When I was out of Tanya's eyesight, I made a sharp turn and headed towards my own room. I locked the door, although it probably wasn't going to stop anyone here, and turned on some Mozart.

I had to clear my head or I wouldn't be able to focus on the plan we had to come up with for the werewolves. His Bassoon Concerto in Bb came on. It was one of my favorites. The bassoon was an exquisite instrument in my mind. I let myself dissolve into the notes.

I heard a light knock on my door. My eyes snapped open. 45 minutes had already flown by. Ah, Mozart. But it had been a wasted effort, because as soon as I focused back in on reality, thought after thought popped countlessly back into my mind.

I opened the door to find Alice. I peered lightly into her mind. The meeting was starting now. It was going to go well. But I would have to sit next to Tanya. I shuddered again and followed silently.

We gathered around the Denali coven's massive and useless dining room table. Tanya sat in the chair next to me. I debated getting up and moving but she would undoubtedly follow. Disgusting creature.

"Let's get started," Carlisle said. "Edward and Alice, please explain to the group what you have seen." We obeyed him. Occasional hisses were heard around the table as we told our tales.

"It was absolutely horrifying," Alice said. "We have to do something."

"Do you know how many werewolves are in the pack?" Carlisle asked.

"No," she replied. "Edward and I decided to run before we found out the hard way."

"Probably a good choice. Would anyone like to volunteer to return and find out? We must know. Someone who's fast. And...well, it will have to be Edward. No one else knows how to get there and he's most likely the fastest anyways. Would you like someone to accompany you, Edward?"

"No," I said, probably too quickly. I knew Tanya would jump through hoops to convince Carlisle to let her be my companion for the journey and I would rather the werewolves just eat me alive. I could handle it alone anyways.

"Well, then it's settled. Edward will find out the numbers of the pack and we will take it from there. You should probably leave soon, Edward. No use in delaying."

I nodded towards him and turned to give Alice a meaningful look. She hugged me quickly and I departed.

I ran off in the direction of the large clearing. I knew I would smell them soon enough. And I did. The rotting human stench combined with the odor of the werewolves was repulsive. I slowed to a stop to decipher the direction of the wind. I had to place myself downwind from them so they didn't catch my scent as quickly.

I carefully positioned myself to the southeasternmost point of the clearing. I sniffed around for a few moments and slowly began to edge towards the source of their smell. Then I doubled back. Testing the wind once more, I decided it was better to just make a run for it. With as much speed I could muster I ran straight towards the scent.

Staying about a mile into the trees around the clearing I began to run around its perimeter. Slowly, I began to close the distance between the edge of the clearing and myself. Finally, I caught a glimpse. One more small glimpse to double check my count and I could leave.

Perfect. I whipped around and ran back with the wind to my starting point. Once there I slowed slightly to make sure the thought had registered within my brain. It was a pointless action, because I knew I would never forget. I took a deep breath to make sure the wolves weren't following, and once I was sure it was safe I ran back to Denali.

* * *

"Thirteen," I announced to the group. "Thirteen filthy werewolves."

"Well, that's unlucky," Jasper quipped.

"Oh, shut up," Emmett said. He had a huge grin on his face, clearly anticipating the fight. "We can take 'em down!"

"We're outnumbered though!" said Alice. "Our coven has seven and the Denali's have five. We've only got twelve."

"Oh thank heaven, she can count!" Rosalie snapped. "If you think I'm going to risk my life for a bunch of useless humans, you've got another thing comin'."

The grin on Emmett's face disappeared. He was so whipped. "Oh, come on, baby. It'll be fun. We haven't had a challenge like this in so long," he pouted.

Rosalie said nothing. She just stared at him angrily.

Carlisle cleared his throat. "I suggest that we simply go as a group at dawn. Hmm.. Edward, Jasper, and myself will confront the werewolves, since we work well together at threats, due to their powers and my well... peaceful disposition, should I say? The rest will serve as back up. Is this suitable for everyone?"

The group nodded in consent.

"Good. Meet by the lake at dawn tomorrow and we will depart. Questions?"

No one said anything. "Good evening," Carlisle said, and walked away to his room with Esme.

I slipped quickly into my room to avoid Tanya. The woman was deranged. I decided it was a good idea to just go ahead and confront all the feelings that I was experiencing, so I turned the Mozart back on and lowered the volume down to the lowest setting. It was still quite loud for my ears though.

Feeling number one: hatred. Hatred directed towards Tanya and the entirety of the human girl populace, excluding Bella. Stupid women. Throwing themselves at me day and night when all I wanted to do was forget. Especially Tanya. Why couldn't that woman just take a hint?

She could probably have any other man she wanted. Well, maybe not. Not if she acted like that around all of them. Ugh. Also I felt hatred towards those werewolves. I didn't want to get into that though. I pushed the thought to the back of my mind.

Feeling number two: loneliness. Oh, how I missed Bella. Her cute clumsiness. Her adorable laugh. Her big chocolate eyes. Her absurd self-conciousness. Her floral fragrance, just like freesia. Her full, beautiful lips. And her tantalizing smell. My Bella, my Bella, my Bella. Oh, how I wish you could hear me, love. I wish you were here with me. I wish you were with me forever. Oh, Bella. I love you.

Feeling number three: Um... I had completely lost my train of thought. All I could think about was Bella. I had to get back to her. I didn't care how much danger I was putting her in anymore. I was essentially a selfish creature, but I was okay with that. I craved Bella. I needed Bella. I loved Bella.

It was in that precise moment that I made the decision. I was going back to Forks, to my love. If she would accept me, I would never leave her again. If she didn't want me though, I would leave her life, no matter how hard it might be for me. I would leave her.

Forever.

**Reviews please! I'll try to post tomorrow, but no promises. Creativity cannot be forced. :) **


	7. Soon

**Disclaimer: Twilight and it's characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

**  
Well. I am horribly sorry for not updating sooner. I was in DC for the weekend. Computerless. tear I promise (yes, I do promise this time) to update more. Read and enjoy:) Oh wait! This chapter might be a little graphic for some. Those of you with weak stomachs, be warned. :)****EPOV**

* * *

I was sitting at an old desk that was in my room at the Denali house. I wasn't really sure what I was doing there. It felt like the right place to be.

I looked outside towards the lake. It was still dark out. The house was eerily quiet. I supposed everyone was preparing for the trip. Although, how could we prepare really?

The sun would be coming up soon. And then we were off to attack the werewolves. Or at least try to reason with them. And then, providing I survived, I would be off to Forks to reclaim my love. I took out a piece of paper and pen and began writing.

Not a minute after I finished, Alice knocked quietly on my door and walked in.

"Good morning, Alice."

"Hi, Edward. Me and Jasper are about to go down to the lake. Do you want to join us?"

"Sure, I'll be right there."

"Okay. Don't be long." She slipped out of the door and into the hall.

I folded up my piece of paper and placed it carefully inside an envelope. I made sure to breathe excessively on the envelope while I licked it to seal it. Hopefully, the scent of my breath would remain long enough for her to smell it.

_Bella._

I wrote her name on the envelope, tucked it away, and headed off to meet up with Alice and Jasper.

"Good to see you all this morning," Carlisle said, somewhat majestically. "As planned yesterday, Jasper, Edward, and I will go ahead and attempt to reason with the werewolves. The rest of you... be waiting for the signal."

"The signal?" Rosalie asked coldly. She was hanging on Emmett's arm, her face expressionless. I felt a pang of empathy for her. I knew how much she loved Emmett and didn't want him to be hurt. But at the same time, I wished she would suck it up. These were innocent human lives at stake here.

"I'll whistle. When you hear it run to us as fast as you can. I don't know how much time we will have if the wolves decide to attack."

Her face remained blank. I looked away and walked to Carlisle's side.

"Any questions?" he asked. "Alright then. If you're all ready..." And he took off.

I took lead after a while. After a while I began to faintly smell that repulsive stench. I slowed a little and whispered to Carlisle.

"We have to lead everyone downwind of the pack. Otherwise, they'll catch the scent and know that we three are not alone."

"Yes, good idea." He stopped abruptly and tested the wind on his finger as I had done yesterday. Then we began to run again. We stopped at our destination: a dense forest patch about three miles downwind from the pack.

I stood by Carlisle's side as we watied for Jasper to say a last goodbye to Alice. They simply shared a hug but it was more than I could bear. It was hard not to miss the extent of their love. It hung around them like an aura. I looked away.

When he joined up with me and Carlisle, I began to lead them towards the pack. I started out by mimicking my earlier pattern. I stayed about a mile in and ran the perimeter. We didn't want to frighten the werewolves. Eventually, Carlisle nodded towards me and we began to run towards the clearing. We slowed up about 50 feet in and gracefully came to a full stop at the edge of the clearing.

They were all laying around a fire in wolf form, so each one of them noticed us immediately. Snarls began to emit from their throats. Carlisle stepped forward. Jasper closed his eyes and stood motionless. I felt the strange calm wash over me.

"Hello, my name is Carlisle and these are Edward and Jasper. I hope we are not intruding."

One light brown wolf growled angrily but silenced suddenly as a larger, almost black wolf stepped forward. He shook himself and morphed back into his human form, somehow slipping on a pair of shorts in the process. He was an older man with deep wrinkles and black eyes. Obviously the leader.

"What is your business here?" he said coldly.

"We are part of a coven of vampires that do not drink the blood of humans. But we have caught the scent of human blood from your area and came to check it out. It's bothering some of our younger members."

"I see," said the man. "It's bothering you, you say?"

"Our newest members have a low tolerancy for human blood. From the looks of it, you aren't very thorough in the feeding process. You've spilled quite a bit of blood. Normally, this wouldn't be a problem for us, but there is such a large amount of blood that it's hard to ignore. Surely, you understand."

"Yes, yes. Well, I am terribly sorry that we have disturbed your peace. But... what and how we choose to eat is none of your business." He soared through the air, changing back into the black wolf, his shorts shredding into pieces. Carlisle's high whistle shreiked through the air.

He landed on top of Carlisle and the two began to fight ferociously. The rest of wolves were standing in a defensive line, snarling loudly and foaming at the mouth like rabid dogs. I no longer felt calm. I looked over at Jasper. His eyes were locked wide open with fear. I could just imagine how all those poor humans felt when they were about to be eaten.

Jasper and I stood perfectly motionless waiting for our back up. Right on cue the rest of our mini army came running through the trees. I caught a glimpse of Emmett. His face was priceless. He looked like a little kid playing in his first football game. Absolutely gleeful, but determined.

The wolves lunged forward all at once. We did the same. I headed for one reddish brown colored wolf who looked particularly cocky. I sifted through his thoughts quickly. He was just like Emmett. This was just a game to him. And he was definitely cocky.

I was reading his every move, but he was still going strong. He was a good fighter. I felt a sharp pain shoot through my left shoulder. He had sunk one of his ugly teeth into it and tore a clean line down to my elbow. It only made me angrier. I lunged at him like a savage. He was finished in no time at all.

I whipped around and took a quick survey. Emmett and Rosalie were paired up on a large gray wolf. Alice was finishing up another. The Denali coven were working as a team, taking on five werewolves. Carlisle was on his second and Esme was violently working on a dark brown one. For the most part we were unscathed.

Except Jasper. He seemed to be struggling. He had several wounds on his arms and blood was seeping through his pant leg. I ran over and sank my teeth into the side of the wolf's neck. He thrashed around violently until Jasper threw a clean punch to his face. It kind of hurt me, but the wolf was done for.

There was still one wolf left, by my count. I scanned the trees. No sign of him. I ran towards the big rock that was at the north end of the clearing. I saw a young, wounded boy lying behind it. He was whimpering and barely breathing.

"Hey. What's your name?" he croaked.

"Edward."

"Sue Clearwater. Remember her name. Tell her that I love her."

"Your name?"

"Seth. It's Seth. Kill me. Please, kill me now. I can't take the pain. Please."

I searched around for the pain he was speaking of and I found it quickly. A large gash ran from the bottom of his rib cage to the top of his hip. His werewolf body was trying desperately to seal it but it couldn't work fast enough. Blood was pouring out through the gaping wound. I could see his organs working faintly through the cut. My stomach executed a small flip.

"Please," he barely managed to whisper.

Might as well put him out of his misery. He was going to die anyways. I reached down and snapped his neck in one quick, fluid motion.

By the time I stepped back out into the clearing, the wolves were finished off. Alice and Esme were tending to wounds. Jasper was leaning against a rock, his face solemn. Carlisle spoke.

"Let's just be thankful no one of our party got seriously hurt." His face was expressionless.

We silently returned to Denali a while later. I checked in with each of my family to make sure everyone was okay. They were. I checked Carlisle last. He still looked blank. I didn't read into his mind. I tried to respect his boundaries. He seemed so unhappy.

"I'm leaving tomorrow," I said. He looked up at me questioningly.

"I can't live without her, Carlisle. I don't have the power. I need Bella. I have to be with her. I'm going back to Forks."

"My dear son, I am so glad you've made this decision. I never thought I'd see the day you'd ever be happy again after leaving her. We will be ready. You will not return on your own."

"Thank you, Carlisle. For putting up with me and supporting me. Thank you. I couldn't ask for a better father."

He smiled lightly at me and I turned back towards my room. I couldn't help the smile that spread over my face. Tomorrow I would see Bella.

Then, I just had to wait for her decision. The suspense was already killing me.

I laid down on the easy chair in my room and looked out over the lake.

_Goodnight, Bella, my love. We will be together soon. Please forgive me. I love you._

**Reviews, please :)**

**And again, I promise to update more. I really promise this time. :)**


	8. The Note

**Disclaimer: Twilight and it's respective characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. Story plot and additional characters belong to none other than -- moi.**

**First of all, thanks for the wonderful reviews. You guys are fantastic. Especially the girl who comments on every chapter. You know who you are :)**

**Enjoy:)**

* * *

**BPOV**

Jason and I were in the car driving to my house. Everything was quiet except the engine. And it wasn't the good kind of quiet either. It was the bad kind. The awkward kind. The kind where you think you should say something but there's nothing right to say.

Jason had just had an emotional episode. He knew that I couldn't love him properly because I was still very much in love with Edward and I felt extremely bad for leading him on like that. Why did I have to be so selfish? I should've just left him alone like a good friend. I knew too that I could never love anyone more than Edward. I just chose to ignore it because I loved Jason's presence so much.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. I had already lost Edward. And now I was about to lose Jason too. Well, that was not going to happen.

"Pull over," I said.

"What?"

"I said _pull over_."

The car slowed to a stop on the shoulder of the road.

"Jason. I can't keep going back and forth like this. I know that I love Edward but I love you too. And it's really confusing for me to try to decipher these feelings. I'm just so new to it, you know? And I don't have Edward anymore. I really want to be with you."

I paused for a moment while I tried to think of a good way to express how I felt about him. He just watched silently.

"When Edward left me...it was like he had taken a hammer to my heart and left it broken in millions of pieces. But everytime I'm with you, it's like my heart is trying to pull itself back together. And you're helping it and giving it tape and glue and staples. It's a desperate attempt but it's kind of working. And I don't want you to leave too. Because I don't think my heart can't handle being alone again."

Jason didn't respond for a few minutes. His face was hard and he was staring straight out at the horizon. "Typical. You're just like every other girl. You don't want me because you love me. You want me just to have me."

"No, it's not like that! Well... I don't know. Maybe it is. I really just don't want to lose you Jason!" I was having a hard time talking. My thoughts were making as much sense to me as the words that were coming out probably did to Jason. Tears were welling up in my eyes and a lump formed in the back of my throat. I swallowed hard.

"Please, try to understand me. I don't know if you've ever experienced the kind of abandonment I felt. It's hard to let go, but you make it easier to forget."

"No, Bella. I don't want to be a replacement. I want to be the one. And if you can't give that to me, then this isn't the right thing to be doing. And I know you know that. I'm taking you home now."

"No! Jason, please! I don't want to lose you!" The tears were streaming down relentlessly now. I tried hard to breathe and form a coherent sentence.

"You're my best friend."

Finally, I seemed to have struck the right nerve.

His face softened and he looked at me.

"You're my best friend too and I don't want to lose you either. But it's so hard not to lose control. I don't want to have to hold back the love I feel for you. But I know if we take it too fast, it'll just distract you that much longer from Edward. And when you do remember him it'll be that much harder for me...for both of us to let go. I don't want that to happen. I can't handle it."

"Oh. Well...what if we just take it slow. And get to know the smallest parts of each other. That way when I say I love you, it will be the deepest kind of love imaginable. Deeper than my love for Edward. Deep enough to let me let go."

"I think...that's a good place to start."

I smiled and wiped the tears off my face with the back of my hand.

"Take me home anyways, though. I think a break from each other is long past due."

"Fine."

"See you at school tomorrow," Jason said from the car. I had one foot in the door.

"Later, bud." I waved at him. He chuckled and backed out of my driveway. I walked upstairs and washed my face. I changed into some sweats, tossed my hair up into a messy bun, and plopped myself down on the couch to watch T.V. I mindlessly flipped through the channels, not really knowing what I wanted to watch.

I stopped on the Food channel. Some chef that I didn't recognize was making some pasta. Suddenly, I craved for a bowl of spaghetti. I put some water on the stove to boil.

I started to walk back to the T.V., but instead walked up to my room. I dug up the box of stuff I left at the Cullen's. I pulled out a weathered copy of Romeo and Juliet, and walked back into the kitchen. I began reading.

In no time at all, the water was boiling. I dog-eared my page and set the book on the counter. I poured some noodles in and warmed up a bowl of Ragu. My stomach was starting to growl now. It was 4:17. Wow, where had the day gone? Charlie would be home soon. I added some more noodles to the pot.

I waited impatiently for the noodles to cook. When they were eventually done I drained them, covered them in sauce and gave myself an oversized helping. I stuck the rest in fridge for Charlie.

I scarfed it down quickly and returned to the living room. I surfed through the channels again, this time stopping on Comedy Central. Scrubs was on. I loved that show! I stretched out on the couch and propped myself up on a bunch of pillows.

Soon, I was asleep. I dreamed that I was lying in a bright meadow next to a little boy and a man. I turned my head to see who the man was. The face was too blurry to make out.

I woke up a while later. It was 6 in the morning. I hadn't heard Charlie come in from work last night. He had covered me up with a blanket and turned off the T.V.

I trudged upstairs, knowing I wouldn't be able to get back to sleep. I took a long, hot shower and readied myself for the day. I deliberately took a really long time doing everything, but it was a pointless effort. By the time I was done, I still had 45 minutes until I had to leave for school. I curled up on my bed with Romeo and Juliet and read until it was time to go.

Eventually I made it into my truck. There was a note on the seat. I hadn't been in my truck for a while. I couldn't remember if it was there before or not. It had my name on it though. I picked it up and tore it open.

The second I did that, I swear I could faintly smell a sweet scent. Feeling a little ridiculous, I sniffed the letter. My head spun. It smelled exactly like Edward's breath. I looked back at my name on the front. It was written in flawless elegant script. Edward's flawess elegant script. My heart beat accelerated and I felt nauseous. I took the letter out of the envelope.

_My dearest Bella,_

_In my time away from you, I have realized that I can't be without you. I feel like I am dying slowly, as much as is possible for someone like me to do. Take a few deep breaths, please, before you read on._

Oh, he knew me so well. I was on the verge of hyperventilation. I obeyed his request.

_I don't know what has happened in the months I've been gone. Maybe you have found a new love. Maybe you hate me for leaving you. What I do know is that I am absolutely in love with you, Bella. I always have been and I always will. If you can forgive me for the horrible things I've done to you, meet me at the bench by the big oak tree during lunch._

_I love you,  
Edward._

Was this really happening? I had just straightened things out with Jason! Maybe...maybe this was someone trying to mess with me. The beautiful handwriting possibly could have been done with hard work and patience.. But what about the smell? Oh it smelled JUST like Edward. But maybe I was imagining it. I had been known to do that. After a few minutes of some serious freaking out, I decided to just ignore it. There was no way Edward came back. He just wasn't that kind of person.

I drove to school. My morning catastrophe caused me to almost be late so I was running to first period when it happened.

Time slowed momentarily as my shoe sole caught on the floor and sent me hurtling towards the gray tile. Oh, boy was this going to hurt.

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**Reviews, please:) Hey, I kept my promise.. I think I deserve some love.**


	9. Never

**Disclaimer: Twilight is Stephenie Meyer's.**

**A.N.: So I have a little story for you guys. Remember how I promised to update more often? Yeah, I've had this chapter like 20 sentences away from being finished for about 2 days. But the night I was going to finish it, my little brother got in trouble and my dad spanked him. And I have really strong feelings about that so I went to my room and started crying and I got mad at my dad. **

**So he came into my room uninvited and he babbled on for like an hour about how my little brother deserved it because nothing else was working. He actually said to me "While, I was doing that I was totally in control." Hell no, you weren't, dad. He spanked my baby brother entirely too hard. He still has marks. That's just wrong. He also said "It had to be done." No, you know what? You don't _have _to hit your child. It's wrong. **

**But anyways he expected me to forgive him completely and give him a hug goodnight and I told him no. So he took away my laptop cord. And I know, laptops are supposed to work for a while on their batteries, but mine is a senior citizen so it can't. But anyways I just got it back tonight. I had to stick it out. Cause I couldn't let him know that I was that addicted to my laptop. And I couldn't let him bribe me into a hug. So, I'm sorry. It really wasn't my fault. Hopefully you understand.**

**Sorry that you had to read all that ranting and raving, haha. But anyways...**

**Read and enjoy:)  
And trust me, you _will_ enjoy this chapter.**

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**BPOV**

I squeezed my eyes shut and threw my arms out in front of me in anticipation of the fall. I landed on something cold and hard.

But it wasn't the floor.

I opened my eyes slowly and my breath caught. I started crying almost instantaneously as soon as I saw the face of my savior.

"Edward! Edward, I've missed you so much! I didn't think you would ever come back! Oh, Edward!" I buried my face into his chest.

I sobbed for a good five minutes before I could talk again.

"Edward, why did you come back?"

"Do you not want me here?" His velvety voice threw me into hysterics. I was crying and laughing all at the same time.

"No, no! I want you here! And don't you ever leave me again! I'm so happy that you're here, but I don't understand! I thought you would never come back!"

"I can't live without you, Bella. You are my life."

I finally brought myself to look at his face again. It brought more tears to my eyes. He was so beautiful. But there was something wrong. His mouth was set in a hard line and his eyes were looking at everything except me.

"Oh!" I jumped out of his arms as soon as the realization hit me. I could see the bloodlust plain on his face. I backed away as far as I could handle. I already missed his cold embrace.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I'll have to desensitize myself again. Oh, but how I wish I could hold you. I have missed you too. More than anything. Please, come back. I can handle it."

I gladly nestled myself back into his arms.

"Are you totally opposed to skipping school today?" he asked gently.

"No, not at all! As long as you don't leave me, Edward."

"Never again. As long as I exist."

I smiled.

"Can you walk?" he asked.

"Umm, I don't think so," I admitted sheepishly. I was completely out of breath. That and I really didn't want to let go of him just yet.

He picked me up gently and carried me to his shiny Volvo. It was such a good sight to me. It brought back an entire flood of memories and I couldn't help but start crying again. Edward smoothed my hair away from my face and set me into my seat. He slowly buckled me in, deeply sniffing me all over. He paused for a long time at my collarbone.

I got a little worried after a few moments and my heart started to speed up.

He chuckled and backed away.

"You smell so good. It's almost unbearable. Almost." He smiled crookedly and backed away after one last inhale and got into the driver's seat. The drive was silent. This was definitely the good kind though. The familiar purr of Edward's Volvo was extremely comforting. I reveled in the serenity.

"Wake up, love. We're here." Edward gently shook my shoulder.

"Oh! I'm sorry I didn't realize I was so tired. I shouldn't be tired, though, I mean I had a full night's sleep last night."

Edward laughed lightly. "Come on, let's go."

I looked around. We were at the edge of the forest.

"Alright, well I don't know if I'm ready to carry you on my back so... Well, I'll try." He was such a show-off. He bent his knees so I could climb on. But my feet were nailed to the ground. Seeing him in that stance, like a crouching tiger, was unbelievably sexy. I ripped my feet out of their spots and climbed on his granite back.

I sniffed the back of his neck deeply. Probably a bad idea.

"Please don't, love. This is already hard enough."

"I'm sorry."

"Are you ready?"

"I think so," I lied. I definitely was not ready. I hated riding on his back. It made me woozy.

He took off at full speed. He just couldn't ease into it could he? I squeezed my eyes shut and wrapped myelf around him tighter.

But luckily, it was over in no time. I gingerly slid down his back and onto the ground. I fell into Edward, my balance ruined from the extreme nausea I was experiencing.

He steadied me and rubbed soothing circles into my back while I tried to compose myself.

After a while, I started feeling a little ridiculous and lied to Edward that I felt better. He looked at me skeptically, but he led me forwards anyways. We stepped into our meadow. The nausea faded.

I had always felt so safe here. It was a special place for Edward and I, and I was glad he brought me here. This was way better than school.

"What better way to desensitize myself than to spend the entire day alone with you?" Edward said gently with a small smile on his face. He loped gracefully to a sunny spot on the field and stripped his shirt off.

Light threw off him in every direction and it took all of my power to stop staring and walk to him. I got there eventually and we both sat down in the grass.

"Let's start over from day one," Edward said with a faint smirk.

"Okay," I agreed. "Oh my, Edward!" I said in a heavy fake southern accent. "What on earth are you? Your skin is so...so glittery!"

"Well," he said formally, playing along. "I am a vampire, Bella. And I thirst for your blood every waking moment of my life." He growled and lunged playfully towards me.

I almost jumped out of my skin at his sudden blindingly fast movement.

"Did I scare you, darling?"

I scoffed at him. "No."

"Liar. Let me make it up to you with a game. You ask me any question you want the answer to and I'll tell you. No strings attached."

"Oh, I like this game! Hmm...Coke or Pepsi?"

"Coke. Is that the best you can come up with?"

"I thought I'd spare you for the first few minutes. I mean, we are just getting to know each other," I reminded him, keeping up the charade.

"Right, of course, of course. Sorry I interrupted. Continue."

"What did you want to be when you grew up?"

"That's a hard one. Let me think." He put on a serious thinking face. I tried my best not to laugh. "I think I wanted to be a teacher."

"Really? Oh, that is so like you. Always thinking you're smarter than everyone else."

"Well, excuse me for wanting to share my knowledge with the rest of humanity."

"What's your favorite music?"

"What a silly question. Well, actually I've grown quite fond of Jack Johnson lately. He's pretty good. And I do like classical music. I liked the music in the 1950's. That was nice."

"I like Jack Johnson too, do you have his CDs?"

"Another silly question. I've got them all."

"Stop criticizing my questions. You said any question I wanted."

"This is true. I'm sorry, love. I'll stop." He had that smirk on his face again. He was so gorgeous.

"Will you let me listen to your CDs?"

He opened his mouth and then closed it again. "Of course," he said with a smile.

I decided it was time to get down to business. I shifted myself a little so I was facing him directly. His golden eyes were mesmerizing, but I didn't let them distract me from everything I really wanted to know.

"Where did you go?"

"I went to join the Denali clan. Well, actually, I went to a completely deserted region of Alaska first with Alice. And I do mean completely deserted. There were hardly even any animals there. But I couldn't stand being around people. I just wanted to be alone."

"And how did that work out?"

"It didn't. I had to go back to Denali after a while. Alice got thirsty."

"How many members does that clan have?"

"Five."

"Male or female?"

"Both."

"Any beautiful females?"

"That depends on your meaning of beautiful. Beautiful to you and beautiful to me are two completely different concepts."

"Beautiful to a normal human."

"Yes, they were all beautiful in that sense."

"Beautiful to me?"

"Aren't you under the category of 'normal humans'?"

"Who's asking the questions here, Edward?"

"Right. Yes, I suppose they would be beautiful to you."

"Were they beautiful to you?"

"Yes."

I just stared at him. I wasn't expecting that. He just smiled at me.

"Not my type, though. You are the most beautiful being I have ever laid eyes on, Isabella. I would compare them to...Steve Urkel before I compared them to you. Although, there wouldn't be much comparing. As I said, I have never seen a beauty more exquisite than yours in all my years. And that's a lot of years."

"Thank you," I said blushing deeply. He took my hand and pressed his cold lips to it.

"Anything else?"

"Yeah. Um, so you didn't like any of the women in Denali?"

"No, honey. All I could think about was you. There wasn't a single moment that I even paid attention to any of the other women. I actually despised them. I didn't understand why they had to pick me over all the other males in this world."

"What do you mean, 'pick you'?"

"Well, there was one female, Tanya, who was, well probably still is, very interested in me. I try my best to ignore her because I see nothing in her. I don't pay her any attention, so I don't know why she ever wasted her time. But don't worry Bella. I never did and never will love anyone more than I love you." He took my other hand and looked deep into my eyes.

"Please understand, Bella. There is not a single creature in this world that means more to me than you do. You are my life, the bane of my entire existance. My one and only love."

"I do understand."

"Do you? I want to show you. I just... I don't know how."

"You know more than you give yourself credit for, Edward. Just taking me to this meadow shows me how much you love me. But I am only human. I can't help but be jealous."

"There's no need to be."

"I know," My voice lowered to a whisper. "But... I'm just afraid of being hurt because... Because I love you."

"I will never hurt you again, Bella. I think I've already caused you enough pain for the rest of eternity." He pulled me into his lap. I looked up into his eyes again and stared at his godlike face.

"I love you," he said.

He brushed my hair gently away from my face. His icy hands left a trail of blazing heat on my cheek. We sat in silence, just looking into each other's eyes. I never wanted to look away.

I was absolutely overjoyed that I was his only one. I hated knowing that there were so many gorgeous girls out there that he could have if he didn't want me. But he did want me.

"Are you already done asking questions?" Edward asked quietly.

I smiled diabolically. "Not even close."

"Well then, by all means, continue."

I shifted myself again in his lap so I was leaning my head against his chest. The position was strangely familiar and of wave of pain washed over me when I realized this was the same position Edward and I had been in right before he left me. I pushed the feeling down to the bottom of my heart and thought of another question. I tried to think of something that would allow us to get closer. I needed to feel him close to me.

"Do you thirst for my blood right now?"

"I always do." His expression looked pained.

"But is it really hard to control right now? I mean, have you become used to my scent yet?"

"For now, yes. But we'll have to start over as soon as I leave you."

"Leave me?"

"What would Charlie think if I showed up with you?"

"Oh, yeah." I laughed out loud. Telling Charlie that his least favorite boyfriend of mine was back was going to be real fun. I thought for a moment about my next question.

"What color are your underwear?"

"I'm not wearing underwear."

"Ew! I didn't think you were the commando type, Edward."

"Boxer briefs, love."

"Those are a type of underwear, _love_." I mimicked his preferred term of endearment.

He smiled devilishly. "Can I show you what color they are?"

My heart skipped a beat and picked back up in doubletime. "S-sure," I stuttered.

"I have to get up." I climbed out of his lap as fast as I could. He got up of the ground and undid his belt and tossed it to the side. Then, he jumped up and down a few times. His pants dropped lower and lower with each jump. First I saw the elastic strap. Calvin Klein. I almost fainted. Then I saw the color. Simple black. It contrasted beautifully with his pale skin.

My eyes roamed hungrily over his body. I hadn't properly looked before. I looked at his perfectly sculpted chest, the way his abs rippled every time he jumped. I looked at the defined "v" at his hips. My mouth started watering. I couldn't help but imagine what wonders lay right under the two pieces of fabric covering his lower half. I finally realized that he'd stopped jumping. Unfortunately, his pants hadn't really gotten that far. I looked back up at his face. He was just watching me with that crooked grin.

"Answer your question?" he asked. I just nodded my head.

He sat back down, not bothering to put his belt back on or pull his pants back up to their proper height. Fine by me. I crawled into my previous position in his lap again.

"Do you think this is fair?" I asked him.

"Do I think what's fair?"

"That you're sitting here half naked and I have to stay fully clothed."

"You could take your shoes off if you wanted."

I turned my head and glared at him. "Bella, honey," he said. "I can't handle that."

I sighed. He would come around eventually whether he liked it or not. I turned myself around in his lap and ever so slowly brought my face closer to his. I was actually surprised at my courage.

"Is this allowed?"

"Take it slow, sweetheart." I nodded my head and continued on at my snail's pace. "Stop," he ordered. I froze immediately. He placed his hands on each side of my face. After a few seconds, he began to pull me closer. Our foreheads touched. I was breathing heavily. He was too. The scent was making me dizzy. I lowered my eyelids and waited for what I knew was coming.

He brought his lips to mine. I hadn't realized how much I missed his cold kiss. He moved them passionately against mine. I fought with all of my power to keep in control. If he was doing this after only a few hours of being with me, there was no way I would misbehave and ruin it. But even with all of my concentration, my hands wrapped themselves around his neck and pulled him closer.

He groaned quietly and moved his lips away from mine. He didn't stop kissing me though. He made a trail of kisses down my jaw and back up, then down my neck and across my collarbone. Then he kissed my lips once more and pulled away.

"I think that's enough for now," he said breathlessly.

"Yeah," I replied reluctantly.

He stretched out onto his back. I lied down on my stomach and placed my head on his stomach. He ran his fingers through my hair.

"Are you comfortable?" he asked me.

"Extremely."

"Good. Can we just lay here for a while? You feel so warm. I don't want to move."

"Of course. One more question though?"

"Shoot."

"Will you ever leave me again?" I asked, my voice barely a shaky whisper.

"I will never leave you again as long as I exist. No matter what. I am your slave for life. I am your prisoner. I am your friend. I am anything you need me to be. You say 'jump', I say 'how high?'. As long as you love me, I will be with you.

Edward continued running his fingers through my hair. He began to hum an unfamiliar melody. It was very pretty though. I sighed and relaxed all of the muscles in my body.

I would never be alone again.

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**A.N." Told ya you would love it. Well, I hope you loved it anyways. Reviews are much appreciated :)**

**By the way, this is officially my longest chapter yet. You're welcome.**


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